The Golden Child

Dear Parents,

You are welcome. You are welcome that I am the perfect child and that you have to put so little effort into rearing me. No, no, no thanks necessary, I am just playing the faithful son. Between my troubled sister, my lazy brother, and Sammy, who can't do anything for herself, I am obviously the perfect child. My emotions are under control, my grades are good, I do all my chores without being asked, I never ask for anything, I'm beautiful, the list goes on and on. I don't think you could have asked for a better child.

It is quite obvious that I am the favorite child. It's not like I have much competition. My siblings just do not compare to me. They are all needy wrecks, while I am in tip-top shape (both physically and mentally). Dad, who stays up late and watches movies with you and then turns off your laptop after you have fallen asleep? Not Trevor, he falls asleep too. Mom, who bakes with you and it actually turns out well? Not Sammy, she gets in the way. But this isn't about them, it's about me.

I know it will be hard when I am gone next year, but you guys must stay strong. Ill come back and visit. I know that Sammy will never rise to the standards I have set, so please don't hold her to them. They're just out of her league. Remember, she isn't me, she is susceptible to flaws. The golden child knows you guys will always need him, so I will come back so you may bask in my presence.

You're welcome for this letter too,
The golden boy

P.S.
While I am well aware that I am your favorite child (I mean, at least you mom), I am not that egocentric. I will be forever thanking you guys for all that you have done for me, mainly my conception and birth, which I would not exist without. For that reason alone I am indebted to you.

This is going to be a long post script, so you might want to get comfortable.

I have to credit much of who I am to you guys. I think a lot of kids try and avoid being their parents, but if I turn into you, dad, I'd be pretty happy with that. You know, without the gut, at least. What am I saying "if"? When I become you! I know I destined to become just like you guys, I think we are all doomed to become our parent(s) in the end, whether we want to or not. We tell ourselves when we are young, I'll do it this was, not that way. But just you wait and see, you'll be doing that way. And really, if you think about it that way isn't so bad. You guys (our parents) do what you do in our best interest and I don't think that kids these days really realize that. You guys don't hate us, you're not terrible, you are the spawn of Satan. You in fact love us very much and want the best for us and you know that teenagers are stupid and do stupid things, cause Hey! you guys were teenagers too (it's hard to imagine, that was like when the dinosaurs roamed). But regardless of the time period, you guess went threw the same s*** we have to go through; the drama, the relationships, the hardships, the joys, the parties, the drugs, you guys all did it first. You guys know how this stuff works and the stuff you tell us not to do isn't because you're tying to kill our vibes, man, but in fact protect us. I think we, as the youngins, need to understand this more.

Now, I don't think we turn into exact copies of you guys, that would be weird, but we tweek it a little bit to fit ourselves and to fit the time. In the future, I'll have the "song of the day", just like you did for me day, on whatever medium they are producing songs in the future. Will it be just like your music taste? No. But the idea is the same. I'm probably going to raise my child with more Buddhist ideals, but I won't force him into the religion, just like you guys didn't force me.

I know I can never join that bandwagon of parent shaming, because you guys did a fantastic job. I must say I am amazing. I'm joking. But seriously, I really appreciate all that you have done for me. I mean you had to raise Trevor and I at the same exact time, and we both turned out alright (Trevor still need some help). I know I am the favorite, but it is only because you raised me to be this way.

I guess it wasn't too long.

Frankl-y Speaking

Speaking frankly, I appreciate Viktor Frankl's ideas. While I don't necessarily agree (more on that later), I can see the value in his creative thinking. Given what he has had to go through it is especially fitting as well. I guess I should describe what he thought instead of just talking about it like you already know. So lets go.

Viktor Frankl was one of the lucky/unlcuky to have to lived through the holocaust (lucky since he survived, unlucky since he had to experience it). He says that he is able to do by giving his life meaning and holding on to this meaning. It is this meaning that he draws his strength from and is able to survive the atrocities of the concentration camps. This is where he comes up with his idea for logo-therapy, the idea that man is always searching for a meaning. This meaning can be anything, whether big or small, and it just has to give purpose to someones life. 

This is very helpful in the sense of motivating people and encouraging them. However I do not believe that there always has to be a meaning in life. I think we can just live life. I think that by always searching for a meaning we are never really happy with what we have and we never appreciate where we have come. I don't think that we should stop trying to better ourselves, but that shouldn't be our purpose or meaning. There is much we can appreciate by just enjoying the moment and not clinging to desires not yet achieved, but that can't be achieved if we seek it. I want people to enjoy their lives. I want people to be free from a constant sort of struggle, and Viktor Frankl endorses this inner struggle, or tension as he calls it, and that is why I don't agree with him. When you realize that nothing last, why put a meaning on it? 

Our Stranger Meaning

Shakyamuni Buddha (The Buddha) has taught us that meaning in life to end suffering (dukkha), well rather that which causes discomfort. Suffering is a little harsh. Anyways, though his teachings he has taught us that the life we lead and everything around is impermanent and subject to end. Because of this impermanence it is unnecessary to create attachments which cause suffering. This is not to say we cannot have joy in out life and that our lives our to be banal and stoic. They're supposed to be compassionate and joyful, but this is beside the point. The main point of Shakyamuni's teachings was to bring an end to the dukkha that plague us. Outside of this, the goal which bring joys varies between person to person. Shakyamuni had no problem with doing what you enjoyed, so if in turn it gives you another meaning, it is fine.
Being a student of Buddha, I concur with what he is teaching as his meaning, for obvious reasons. I have come to realize the dukkhas in life and realize through positive actions I can negate the suffering in my life and others. Outside of the cessation of suffering I find little to no meaning however. I see everything as very impermanent, much like Buddha taught, and for that I myself put no meaning into it. But that is just me. That is not to say my life is devoid and empty. I enjoy the company if my friends and family and fill my time with hobbies that I enjoy, but I know that they are subject to change and do not hold it against them.
But that is just me. Meaning is subjective to everyone and life's meaning is no different. In fact, even followers of Buddha like me may have different meaning of life then I do, and that is alright too. Who are we to tell another man that we are right and they are wrong?

Classmate that I am Thankful for

I hate picking favorites. I always feel bad for the people who I don't pick. Like if they read this, and see they are not picked, they might feel bad and I don't want that. So, with that said, I am thankful for everyone. I am quite serious when I say this too. Everyone in the classroom which I am in, I am grateful for. I am actually quite grateful for everyone in my life, but that is bigger than this. There is no one that I want to pick out in particular and give special recognition to because each person brings something new to the table. With each person there is a new thought and opinion and it broadens my horizon on the scoop of life. Too meta? Maybe. But regardless I am very grateful for everyone.

All Alone

I don't think that we are meant to be alone. It's not natural. It's frightening. When you think about it on an natural, evolutionary basis, we are social creatures. We live in groups to survive. We are not as big or strong, or as fast as some of the other predators in the natural world. Our ancient ancestors lived in groups to help insure survival. Together they were able to fend off large threats and keep each other safe. These primitive traits learned to carry on to our currents lives and is why we seek comforts from others. We are all familiar with that old saying, strength in numbers. It also applies to our mental happiness. We need other people with to give us comfort, strength, and hope. Things that, in a dire time, we can not give ourselves.  And so we turn to others. Being alone, is more of a punishment than it is a gift.

Now we may be able to gather our thoughts when we are by ourselves. We are able to think clearer and process things better when we're alone, maybe. But who will challenge these thoughts, how will we know if we are right. After awhile our thoughts are no longer enough. They do not sustain us like a real person can, that is why we start making people up. 

In the movie "Into the Wild" we witness Chris McCandless come to this realization unfortunately late in his life. He realized that he was happy when was with others. And this was actually pretty evident through the movie. Now, is that actually true for his real life, I can not say, but it might hold some truth. If he did spend time with generally good people he would have been happier with them then alone.
We are not supposed to be alone. We need others to share our thoughts and useless information that is racing around our minds. Without this means of an export, we go crazy. 

We Still Haven't Figured it Out Yet

What have we figured out? The circumference of the Earth (24,901 miles), how many molecules are in a cubic meter (depends on the molecular make up), how to send robots to Mars. While these are all well and good, what difference do they make in our lives? Have we really figured out anything that is important to who we are as human being and what we are supposed to do.

We still haven't figured out how to be happy. How to love and accept one another. To not kill one another mindlessly. We've been on this planet for quite some time and we still haven't figured it out. Haven't learned that we are all just one race. And as we progress, we figure out how to make fast cars or super computers or 3D televisions, but those aren't fundamental.

We have put off learning the fundamentals so we can focus on other things. Material things, and maybe there isn't anything wrong with that. Besides the fact that no one really knows anything anymore, because all the information you could need is at your fingertips, and we are ever lusting for more as we are force fed the idea that more is good. There might not be anything wrong with that. But I digress. We have strayed to far from trying to learn what is to be a global community, a global family, that it is no longer in out minds and we have yet to figure out what it means.

Maybe a few of us have though. They have looked past the insolent knowledge for that which has true meaning. To those I say, please enlighten us, don't leave us in the dark.

How do I Know What I Know?

Dear reader,

How is it that anyone know truly knows anything? Is it because we are told so?Is it one of the great facts of life like how the sky is blue? Is it because everyone else believes it so it must be true? Is is subject to our own experiences? If knowledge derives from any of those examples, the only one that could be qualified would be through experience. How can we justify that because someone told us it was right? That we just know the sky is blue to a blind person, one who has never seen the sky? That because everyone else agrees with it that it is right? There is no way. Knowledge derives from experiences and experiences are personal. But wait! This would make knowledge subjective, and how can something that is known be subjective. The only person it is known to is the one who has experienced it. Experience is the only way to prove how I know what I know. It's not about showing it off afterwards and forcing it on other people. Knowledge is different from person to person as no two people experience things the exact same way.

Goodbye for now
Nathan